Seasons

It was such a beautiful sunny fall day. The air was fresh and crisp, so I walked instead of drove to the bank. Colors of red rust, orange and bright yellows were stunning. It prompted my heart to sing and worship the Creator, the father of creativity and beauty. After all, he could have painted everything a dull grey.

There is another messy side to fall. Flowers have done their blooming,looking straggly and falling over, corn stalks need to be removed and disposed of or composted. Impatiens plants, touched by an early frost, are slippery and hard to remove from the wet soil. I do not like this side of gardening at all and could really do without this part of autumn, but as in life, we take the good with the bad and the ugly and look forward to another new beautiful season.

The Piano

What a day it was, when they moved that upright piano into the livingroom of the farmhouse. At the age of about fourteen, I don't recall any previous discussion about such an extravagant purchase, but there it was! Singing and music was always a part of our family gatherings. We would gather around and my Aunts & Uncles would bring out the guitars, accordian, harmonica and now we had a piano!

After every meal, I would leave the table quickly and go figure out tunes and diddle around on the keys till I was summoned back to the kitchen to help with the dishes. Playing by ear came naturally, and soon I taught myself to read notes. Many times I would try to play through the hymnbook and imagine myself as church pianist.

I wanted to take piano lessons more than anything, and yet this did not seem to be a priorty at that time.

However, I did become the church pianist and did quite well for many years. However, I was in real trouble if I was called upon to play something I was not familiar with, or if the key signature had more than 2 sharps. (flats were no problem) Also I could not figure out the timing of a new song and this made for some extremely embarrassing situations.

this summer, we took a trip to a Gospel Music Convention. What a smorgasbord feast of singing and music that was! The Saturday matinee featured a "Pianorama". Four large grand pianos on stage and four of the most talented pianists I have ever heard let loose. How I wished I could have learned to play like that.

IT WAS ONLY A WALNUT

Twelve year old Jake and his younger pal, Tyler, were just trying out their slingshots, shooting small rocks at fence posts and trees. The long farmyard driveway was lined with beautiful walnut trees so they began picking the green walnuts off the trees and found that they were better, smoother amunition than having to find suitable stones. What could be more fun than shooting at moving targets, so they hid behind trees and aimed towards the road at passing vehicles.

My brother, Dave, had just delivered some heavy implements to a farm down the road, when a shocking bang hit the windshield, cracking the glass. He stopped to investigate the damage and looked around to see where the rock could have come from. The BEEP,BEEP,BEEP sounded loudly as he backed up the big rig to two opposite driveways.

He walked onto the right hand yard, where a gentleman was mowing his lawn. After a short conversation they ascertained that there was no way that he could have caused the damage. When Dave was about to climb back into his truck he noticed a whole lot of walnuts strewn beside the road. ah ha.
As he walked down the driveway of the left farm yard, the trees told him that he was onto something. Nearing the house, evidence verified that this could be where the shot had come from. There was no answer at the door, but he could sense that someone was hiding somewhere, so he searched behind buildings and in sheds finding no one and found out later, that they had run for cover in the back forty. They knew they were in trouble!

Upon arriving home, he phoned Bob, a policeman friend, saying, "I have a hunch that some young kids are shooting walnuts at cars, and have no idea what damage they can cause."
He gave him the address of the place and after a few days, the policeman made a call to the farmhouse. After some questioning the young culprits were coerced into admitting their guilt.

Bob phoned Dave and asked, "Do you want to press charges?" Dave replied "No, but I want them to pay the $300 deductible and I want to talk to them personally."

The wise parents insisted that the boys pay their debt from their own allowance, so when Dave arrived at the house, they counted out their hard earned money in five & ten dollar bills and sheepishly handed them over to him.

Then Dave took the two aside and said, "I could have let this little incident pass and my company could have easily paid for the windshield, but then you would have got away with doing something that could cause an accident or serious harm to someone. You two guys are very lucky to have parents who are teaching you to take responsibility for the consequences of your actions. and I want you to remember this."

With a pat and a handshake, he left two very relieved, shaking young lads with a lesson they will never forget.

What a wise brother I have! He may have just saved two young fellows from a life of crime!

Patience of Job.

I just don't know about the statement, "He's got the patience of Job."

As I read through this LONG book, I found that Job got frustrated and lost his patience with his pompous, all-knowing friends, and challenged, yes, even shouted at God for the horrible onslaught of tragedy, humiliation and physical pain bombarding him from every side. He did not know THE WHY and about the Chapter 1 conversation between God and Satan. God said, "I dare you, and you'll see how true Job will remain." Satan threw everything he could at Job outside of killing him, however his faith remained firm, believing that in the end God was just and would not totally forsake him..... but patient, not really.

When accosted by bad things, Job's response was the same as mine often is, "What have I done to deserve this?" But, what an amazing example he is of courage, honesty and steadfastness. REAL!

God is just and holy and always has our ultimate good in mind, but sometimes that is hard to see and believe when it feels like we are mired in the mud and pain.

Coincidences

Lately, I have been amzed, surprised, even shocked at the many coincidences that "just happen".

I was thinking about a friend, and hadn't seen her in a long time. Having heard that she was going through a difficult time, I wondered how I could get in touch with her during this sensitive situation. I was early for an appointment, so to pass the time, I walked into a business store that I had never been in before, and there she was, so we were able to hug, talk and reconnect.

It's not just "Dumb Luck". God ordains our steps in such amazing,wonderful ways.

Christmas Again

When I was a child, it seemed that Christmas just wouldn't come fast enough, but from my senior's perspective now, it comes way too quickly. But I still love it.

Some of My Favorite Things of this Season are...........

The wealth of wonderful music that fills all of December
Holiday lights on every street that brighten up the dark, rainy, wet nights
Grandchildren's Christmas concerts
Tree ornaments that hold a special memory
Connecting with friends & family from far and near
Children's anticipation
Parties and good food
Helping needy here and in other countries
Sharing time with someone who does not have family nearby
Cards & Letters that let me know that they thought about me
Family gatherings

We enjoy all these things in memory of Jesus birth. Wow! He left Heaven, with all it's beauty and glory, to come to this crazy world, in the form of the most vulnerable thing... a human baby.
To die for me. Once again, I am in awe of this reality, humbled and so thankful. Hallelujah!

Dance with Jesus

A few years ago, a song with a strange name was played often on Christian Radio. It immediately became my favorite. It is called "Untitled Hymn" (Come to Jesus) sung by Chris Rice.

The progression of each verse builds with each key word....Come, Sing, Fall, Cry, Dance and culminating with Fly to Jesus. From the moment I heard it, I called it "Matthew's Song" and still cry every time I listen to it.

Matthew died four days ago and is finally free of his frail, deformed body. No more pain and suffering. I loved him so much.

As I prepared flowers for his funeral, I listened to the words once again and I cried many tears of sadness because he will be missed, and tears of joy because I imagine him running, flying and dancing with Jesus.

He will be waiting to welcome me and be able to run, dance and finally speak and say,"Hi Grammie".

Busy, Busy

My apologies for being away from blogging for so long.

How are you doing? How have you been?
When I ask this question, most people will, say " Fine...really busy!"
It seems that we answer "Busy" as if it is an admirable, very good thing...not lazy!
I sometimes chuckle to myself when people almost brag about their busy-ness and yet complain about how busy they are. I maintain that most of our busy-ness is our own fault brought on by the choices we make, so why do we complain about it.

Staying active and involved in many wonderful causes and relationships is good, but in todays' world, it takes an act of the will, to be still and quiet. I want to enjoy such moments more often right here and now in my own backyard; without having to chase, fly or drive for miles to some remote cabin or all-inclusive for a few costly days of it.

"Be still and know that I am God."

Weeds

If Eve could only see the consequences of listening to the serpents lies, she would have thought twice before eating that accursed apple.
The result...weeds, weeds, and more weeds. While I was fighting them today, I was reminded of the parallells between weeds and evil/sin.

Weeds are prolific.
They multiply.At the slightest touch, popweed scatters hundred of little seeds.
Dandelion flowers develop into fluffy puff balls so that the breeze can scatter seeds all over the garden.
Long blackberry vines hang over my fence and if they get near the soil they put down roots immediately.
A flat, spreading nameless plant infested my vegetable garden. I try to dig it out very carefully because any little leaf that falls to the ground roots a new plant.
Weeds need no fertilizer or "weeding" to flourish.

Chickweed forms a green blanket almost over night.
More weed species are emerging which I have never seen before.

If the roots are not completely removed,it will soon grow a new plant. Root systems can travel underground and emerge on the other side of a fence. Horsetail is almost impossible to eradicate because their roots seem almost elastic.

A buttercup seemed to mock me today."Here I am in the center of your heather. Just try and dig me out without killing your precious little plant. ha ha."

After working in the warm sunshine "by the sweat of my brow" it was a satisfying feeling to see the garden clean and weed free. The good can flourish & bloom beautifully for a spell. What a lovely sight, but not for long; so the battle continues. I just cannot stop fighting those ------ weeds!

I must also tend to the garden of my heart. Dig out the weeds of jealousy, pride, laziness and selfishness to give flowers of love, empathy, kindness & truth a chance to flourish.

Thots about Lot

Even though I have re-read this Genesis story several times, I keep mulling over lessons & impressions of this relationship between Abraham & Lot.

God asked Abraham to leave home & country for an unknown destination. We are not told why he took Lot with him. Perhaps he was his favorite nephew, perhaps Lot was an orphan, perhaps he wanted adventure, perhaps he was a juvenile delinquent who needed some strong mentoring, perhaps he was exceptionally good with goats and lambs.
I believe God blessed Lot because of Abraham.

Both became wealthy as their flocks increased in number. They soon discovered there was not enough green pasture and fresh drinking water to supply the needs of both herds. Fearing that violence would ensue, Abraham wisely offered his nephew a peaceful solution..."Choose which land you would like to claim."

Lot selfishly chose the lush Jordan Valley, which was well watered with fertile pastures. This seemed like a wise choice, but Lot did not take into account the physical and spiritual dangers he would encounter there. "Lot pitched his tent toward Sodom".
It seems that he eventually moved right into that wicked city, because he "sat in the gate", which imples a governing position.
This infamous city is still refered to as most evil to this day. It spawned the term "Sodomy". Their pride led them to believe they could live any way they chose, and without consequences. They were unashamed of their actions, infact, proud of their "alternative lifestyles" and perverse ideas - just like our sophisticated, progressive cities of today.

Battle between neighboring kings resulted in the seige of Sodom. Lot and his family were also taken captive. Who came to his rescue? Uncle Abraham! He mobilized over three hundred of his household and chased after them and freed Lot and his whole entourage.

When I hear or see people who are in dire straits because of stupid, unwise choices...problems of their own making.... I tend to lose patience and give up on them. Abraham didn't!

When the angels, disguised as men, came visited Abraham to tell him about the God's
imminent judgement on Sodom; who interceded repeatedly for Lot's home town? Uncle Abraham!

Later when fire and brimstone was about to fall, the angel men had to literally drag Lot out of the city. Why did Lot want to stay there? Perhaps he loved the luxuries of his lifestyle too much. Maybe he couldn't get his wife and family to move. Maybe he thought he could influence the city with his good example, trying to be a good witness for God Jehovah.

By the time I had finished reading the last of Lot's story, I had developed quite a loathing for the man.
But then I was reminded of the verse in 2 Peter 2:7 (The Message) which sheds quite a different light on him.
"God rescued Lot out of Sodom because he was a righteous man who was sick of the shameful immorality of the wicked people around him. Yes, Lot was a righteous man who was tormented in his soul by the wickedness he saw and heard day after day."
(King James) "Lot was vexed.."
God, in his incredible longsuffering patience and love, saw his inner spirit, his heart, his struggles and treated him with mercy. God did not give up on him.

Wow....I am humbled. My perspective and evaluation of Lot has changed.
And I still think Uncle Abraham's powerful intercessory prayer was a major determining factor.

I am thankful for second, third or tenth chances. I am so grateful for prayers prayed on my behalf. Thank you God, for your love and mercy.

Living in the Ark

Now I am into Genesis...where it all began. Chapter six - The Story of Noah.
Many expeditions have been made to prove or disprove the existence of the great flood. To the skeptics, it is a fairy tale, a joke, a silly impossible story.
It's so unbelievably unreal, that it is natural to doubt its' validity.

I choose to accept the biblical account as true. But I can't help but ponder.....hmm.

How did the animals know when to start walking, flying or slithering towards the ark?
Was Noah's wife a good mother-in-law?
How many pairs of species came on board?
What did the family eat? How did they cook?
Where and how did they dispose of sewage and waste?
Where did they go for peace & quiet?
Did they rest on the Sabbath?
Was Noah's family in full agreement with the plan?
Where did they store all the food for the animals?
Did they get seasick?
Where or how did they get water to wash or drink?
How many clothes did they pack?
Did animals try to eat each other?
What was the temperature in the Ark?
What did they use for lighting?
How could they keep their sanity, confined for 150 days till land was dry
enough to disembark?
Did they ever doubt God?

I imagine and I wonder.

Revelation

The biblical writer, John, calls his book "Revelation", and what a revelation it is! The imagery and descriptions of the visions he saw are so bizarre and "out of this world".

I would not be at all surprised if todays script writers of modern science fiction/ animated monstor movies have taken ideas from this book.
I must confess that Revelation is not my favorite. It has always left me with a confused, eerie, uneasy feeling. But this time I am reading it in the contemporary language of "The Message".

Like a great finale to a fireworks show, Peterson writes...."The Bible ends with a flourish; vision and song, doom and deliverance, terror and triumph. The rush of color and sound, image and energy, leaves us reeling. But if we persist through the initial confusion and read, we begin to pick up the rhythms, realize the connections, and find ourselves enlisted as participants in a multidimensional act of Christian worship."

Hearing a good choir sing the Hallelujah Chorus gives me tingles all over. This morning I really got that feeling reading the following words in chapter five. What a picture of worship!

"I looked again. I heard a company of Angels around the Throne, the Animals, and the Elders---ten thousand times ten thousand their number, thousand after thousand after thousand in full song: THE SLAIN LAMB IS WORTHY! TAKE THE POWER, THE WEALTH, THE WISDOM, THE STRENGTH! TAKE THE HONOR, THE GLORY, THE BLESSING!

Then even more joined the singing...can you imagine! Every creature in Heaven and earth, in underworld and sea...all voices in all places.

TO THE ONE ON THE THRONE! TO THE LAMB! THE BLESSING, THE HONOR, THE GLORY, THE STRENGTH, FOR AGE AFTER AGE AFTER AGE.

YES!

About Dancing

I watched an elderly, smiling couple waltzing across the ballroom floor...a perfect romantic picture of sychronized movement and rhythm.

Since my husband and I grew up in an environment where dancing was considered evil, forbidden and frowned upon, we never learned how.

Yes, we have tried, but our stilted, awkward movements usually result in a comedy act rather than an activity of grace and enjoyment.

One night we were dining with friends at a fancy restaurant. We were enjoying the live entertainment of a trio and band. They offered to do special requests for the guests. Since this was our 40th anniversary, I asked them to please sing, "The Rose", one of my husbands favorites.

After a few songs, the singer spoke into the speaker, "And now we'd like to do a special request for John & Esther, who are celebrating their 40th anniversary, and we ask them to take the dance floor at this time."

Well, my husband gave me this shocked, "no way" look. But they were waiting for us, so I said, "We have to do it." I dragged him onto the floor, and said,"Just follow me, wiggle your hips and smile."

I laughed through the whole song as they sang all the verses and repeated the chorus. John was not enjoying this experience at all. He kept saying, "I never knew this song was so long." I got a fit of giggles and laughed through the whole thing. I guess it looked like we were having fun because later in the evening, a gentleman even came to our table and said, "Why don't you dance again. I really enjoyed watching you." Too funny.

When dancing with a partner, it works best if one person knows where he/she is going and is allowed to lead and the other follows.

A few days ago I got this interesting article from a friend, called "Dancing with God".

It focused on the word Guidance which contains the word dance. The first letter G reminds us of God, followed by "u" and "i".

God, you and I dance. God, you and I dance. (interesting observation)

These thoughts came to mind. If I just allow God to lead, the dance can be beautiful because he knows the steps.

Some days our dancing is very awkward because I want to lead, sometimes it is slow and quiet because I am sad or tired. Other days the dance is happy, light and free.... some days He just carries me.

Reminds me of the beautiful song, "Lord of the Dance", but we'll leave that one for another time.

Christmas Day Dinner

It was a different Christmas because our family met on the 23rd. What a wonderful time we had! The little ones had been counting the "sleeps" before they could open the presents that were stashed under Grammies tree. After dinner, it was precious to watch our six year-old granddaughter bring nativity characters to life as the old story was read.

Our Family Christmas Day was over! Now what?
So we enjoyed visits with people who did not have family nearby and brought leftover turkey and trimmings to a sick neighbour.

Looking beyond my comfortable home and space, I see so much hurt, need and pain.
God, please forgive my blinded eyes.
Scripture encourages us not to forget the needy, widows and orphans.

My cousins, Don & Diane, are orphans and have often been forgotten. Their father died when they were very small. Their mother, my aunt, was a hard worker and tried as best she could to raise them, but I am ashamed to say, she did not get much help and support from her extended family. Her parenting consisted of much shouting, slapping, verbal and physical abuse. She remarried which added many other negative family dynamics. This second husband died very suddenly and now they were on their own again. A few years later, she also passed away.

Diane had back/spine surgery and has had difficulty finding a job. She was married, has one daughter, but her marriage ended in divorce. Her common-law husband of ten years, just passed away very suddenly, and she was devastated, so I helped her plan a memorial service for him. Even though she is not physically strong, I admire her amazing strength and courage.

Don was married for ten years, but his wife left him. He has asperger syndrome, which makes him very nervous, agitated, impulsive and exasperating. Constant ridicule and some childhood sexual abuse has left him with bouts of depression and emotional scars. He has worked as a restaurant dishwasher for 25 years. Since they both don't drive, commuting from the city to visit relatives is difficult, therefore many times they have been left out or forgotten.
Their social circle is small. Both are trying to trust God for their future and struggle to "keep the faith" inspite of lifes disappointments and hurts.


On Christmas Day, my husband and I packed up a dinner, picked up Diane, went to Don's cluttered apartment and shared a meal with them. He excitedly tried to clean his kitchen (no running water at the kitchen sink) and prepared mashed potatoes and "well-charred ham".

He kept giving me gifts from his hoarded stash of collectibles. "Here, I want you to have this"......a turquoise necklace and earrings, an old CD, a wooden goose, a silver chain, etc. etc. Over and over we heard, "You are my favorite cousins, I love you."


Needless to say, it was a most memorable,unforgettable Christmas dinner.

ONLY ONE ORANGE

When the boxes of Japanese/Mandarin oranges appear in our stores, we know Christmas is nearing. This reminds me of a poignant story.

Ten boys lived in a small orphanage. It was their only home, a roof over their heads, their only family. The house rules were strict; each lad knew his duties and paid careful mind to obey the rules. Food was meager and carefully rationed, especially fresh fruit.
The boys' very favorite highlight of their drearisome life was Christmas and the greatest treat of all was that on Christmas morning every boy got one orange.

The day before Christmas, Harry was working in the yard, but neglected to clean his boots upon entering the house, tracking mud onto the front hall carpet. The angry headmaster meted out immediate punishment. "No orange for you tomorrow morning!"
At dawn, while his friends enjoyed their delicious fruit, the dejected lad wept bitterly as he lay on his cot till evening. All year he had waited for this one orange. The other lads had kept their distance for fear that he would beg a taste of theirs. At evening he knelt in the darkness, on the cold hard floor beside his bed, trying to say his prayers, but words wouldn't come, only moans and tears of disappointment and hurt.

Suddenly he felt a gentle tap on his shoulder and a soft lump was placed in his hand. Hesitatingly, he began to unwrap the crunched paper and in it were orange peels, carefully taped together in the shape of a ball. He started to nibble at the tart, bitter pieces. As they fell apart, inside were nine orange pieces.
Each boy had given up one small delicious segment, just for him.

I hope this ORANGE story will be a reminder to share from our abundance with those who have so little.

Time really Flies

My apologies for not contributing to this blog for a long period of time.



My husband reached his three score and ten, so had a big party with more than eighty people coming by to help him celebrate this milestone. We are very thankful for his good health and zest for life.



Two days from now, my first grandaughter is getting married, so needless to say, we have been in wedding planning mode for the last several months. Seems like just a few years ago when I held that tiny little bundle in my arms and now she is walking down the aisle to share her life with the man she loves.

I have done flowers for many, many brides, but this is most exciting to design beautiful bouquets in her favorite colors of pink and blue, so I must get busy.



So no theological rhetoric today, but as I am working with flowers, my mind and heart are filled with many emotions, hopes, and dreams for them. I hold them up in prayer to my heavenly father who loves them even more than I do.

The Prairies

We just returned from a wonderful trip to Winnipeg.

There is something beautiful about the wide open prairies. Even though I was only 3 years old when my parents moved from Saskatchewan, my roots are there. So I feel a connection and a bit of nostalgia sweeps over me whenever we pass through, but I would not want to live there.

The BIG skydome covering the vast flat land conjures up feelings of awe and wonder and loneliness. A simple, fresh earthiness prevades. The huge fields of wheat, canola, rye and sunflowers speak of endless hours of hard toil and labor. Dusty little towns look hauntingly sad. There is an unforgiving harshness in the sweltering heat and in the never-ending strong wind that blows sand and snow over the plains.

We saw many abandoned, weathered old buildings such as this one. I wonder what kind of stories this old house could tell?

In the 1930's and 1940's my grandparents and many of my kin experienced unbelievable hardships on this land.
As we travelled the straight endless highway, two such instances came to mind.

On a beautiful winter day, my aunt and her daughter set out to visit their neighbours. They travelled over the snow in a horse-drawn caboose (like a boler trailer on skis). During their visit, they noticed storm clouds forming and decided to head for home. The drifting snow became so blinding that they lost their way. The next morning they were discovered only a short distance from their home, both frozen to death. In my mother's old family album is a little black & white snapshot of them both lying in a home-made coffin. How incredibly sad.

My grandparents, with ten children, travelled on foot from Manitoba to Saskatchewan. A team of horses pulled a wagon with their milk cow in tow. The children took turns walking and riding. At night, Grandma and the girls slept under the wagon part that was canvas covered, while Grandpa and the boys slept under the wagon. After endless miles, a wagon wheel broke. They were tired, discouraged, and alone. With no one in sight, little money, and little food they felt overwhelming despair.
In their distress, they cried out to God for help. They waited..........
As the young boys were walking down the road, kicking stones, a sudden gust of wind blew across their path. Amongst the dust and leaves was a small piece of paper. Imagine their amazement when they realized it was a ten dollar bill. I wish I could have been there to witness the family's rejoicing over this miracle that God had sent. Now they had money to get the wheel fixed!

Over the years they experienced many other hardships on the prairies, but this happening always reminded them that God is faithful.

A Timely Message

In the preface to the "The Message" (the Bible in contemporary language) the author Eugene Peterson says... he taught the biblical languages of Hebrew and Greek in a theological seminary. He expected to live the rest of his life as a professor and scholar, teaching and writing and studying. But then his life took a sudden vocational turn to pastoring a congregation. He was plunged into a different world. Nobody seemed to care much about the Bible, many knew virtually nothing about it, had never read it, and weren't interested in learning. Many others had spent years reading it but for them it had gone flat through familiarity, reduced to cliches. Bored, they dropped it. They found newspapers and magazines, videos and pulp fiction more to their taste.
He saw a great need for getting an understandable version to his congregation and so after ten years of arduous work, "The Message" was born and published.

My reading through the book of Romans took on new meaning when I read Chapter 12 the way Peterson interprets it. I wrote in my journal, "This is for me!!!"


vs. 8 ...if you help, just help, don't take over......if you give encouraging guidance, be careful that you don't get bossy. (ouch)

Just can't miss that message!

New Old Song

Faithful one, so unchanging,
Ageless one, you're my rock of peace.
Lord of all, I depend on you;
I call out to you again and again.

I have always loved this song. It was sung at a funeral I attended today, by two very talented young people.
At the onset of the next part of the song, their voices literally exploded,
"blew me out of the water".... moved me to tears.

YOU ARE MY ROCK IN TIMES OF TROUBLE!
YOU LIFT ME UP WHEN I FALL DOWN!
ALL THROUGH THE STORM YOUR LOVE IS THE ANCHOR!
MY HOPE IS IN YOU ALONE!

It was truly a moment of praise and worship.
Thank you Jackie & Nate

Who Am I

In this case, it's not the game, Who AM I, but the first line of a song.

A secluded lakeside campsite, a comfortable reclining lawnchair, pinescented warm desert breezes, afternoon shade, the bluest sky...birds twittering, ospreys diving for fish, canoes gliding over the calm water. Ah.

Drinking in the incredible beauty and the vastness of God's creation made me feel so small.

This very well-written song came to mind.

Who am I? That the Lord of all the earth, would care to know my name ,
would care to feel my hurt?
Who am I? That the bright and morning star, would choose to light the way,
for my ever wandering heart.

Not because of who I am, but because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done, but because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading, here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean, a vapor in the wind,
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord you catch me when I'm falling and you've told me who I am.
I am yours.

written by Hall, John Mark & Casting Crowns